Ah, growing old… Did you say “wise”? (Reflection)
Originally published inAll Things Girl; Created by women, for women
(Part of Everything Girl; Nov - Dec 2007 | Fresh!)
NOT TOO LONG AGO, someone wise told me that growing old also means growing mature & wise. Though I so badly wanted to believe him, somewhere deep down the person in me refused to accept it. Even after innumerable friends, relationships, heart breaks, I just don’t seem to get it. There are still times when I hurt those who love me the most and put blind faith in others who eventually hurt me ten times worse. And I am exactly where I started, not any wiser. I wish I knew the future, what awaits me as I go through some of those self-defeating times, but I don’t. And I don’t seem to learn. Am I even growing except I can’t escape those birthdays year after year?
But I am so confident about one thing – the signs of aging are pretty obvious. When many of your daily thoughts start delving into the backyards rather than the front lawn, you can be pretty confident that the imaginative grey hairs might actually be for real. Now there’s a road ahead filled with dreams and desires for the future, but while you are at it pumping yourself with all the energy, you seem to get caught up in your past achievements, failures and whatnots. Come on’ grown up!
No, I don’t mean to preach but these are the very things I keep repeating to myself every morning. I wake up each day with thoughts about how to color my days with undying enthusiasm, doing magnanimous gestures, filling others’ lives with sunshine but as the noon draws in, I am shifting deeper into the over stuffed couch and gulping the nth cup of coffee. (...Continued)
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